Weekend tragedy - five, and now six, teenage lives lost needlessly. First, the shock, and now the anger, spreads throughout the close knit small town. Many ask the question, why could this be allowed to happen? Why should they die, and their killer - a drunk man, driving with his child on his lap - live? The danger period is not yet over, physical scars still threatening fragile lives, and emotional ones running still deeper, and lasting far longer.
I was fortunate not to be on shift when this happened, but far away in Melbourne, meeting the students I will be tutoring this year. The hospital had been packed, a kind of controlled chaos, taxing on all involved - doctors, nurses, ambulance, not least the victims and their families.
Whenever a tragedy like this hits, it is a sobering reminder of how small we are in the universe. Without warning, lives are taken away, and it could happen to anyone at any time - yet the universe continues on its course, predominantly unfazed by the transition of a speck of life (of light, of hope, of love) into eternal disappearance. We are made to feel so insignificant, yet our feelings are so great and true, that we cannot reconcile our existence with such an abrupt destiny. Can it be that life exists no more, beyond death?
Call it my stubborn denial, or refusal, or whatever - but God's message is a reassuring reminder to me that, in death, we are joined in heavenly reunion with our Creator. And this, I hope and pray, is the destiny of those who died on the weekend. Jesus died, but He also rose again from the grave to appear before at least 5,000 individuals after His death, in one of the best documented controversies of ancient history. In Christ, we have hope in this world, and much more - we have a certain future with God. Only in His love can we rest peacefully tonight.
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On a much brighter note - I received Sal's Valentine's card yesterday, so cute, so beautiful! Despite our distance, it's so awesome that love refuses to be bound by physical constraints. Thanks for all your love, ladybug!
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Thursday, February 16, 2006
End of another week - start of another weekend...
Phew, today the hot weather returned! Just as the Commonwealth Games torch arrived in town, it was boiling enough outside without needing to heat up even more with a flame! The main mall in town was all closed off, along with some of the main streets, but hardly seemed like the whole town was there - jus a small crowd for the stageshow, and another small crowd watching the watermelon eating competition. Traditional Samoan and Pacific Island dancers shared acts with Koori troupes, with quite fascinating costuming and energetic choreography.
Energetic was quite the opposite of how i've been feeling most of today tho - last night completed a 15 hour day, from start to finish, and flopped on my bed, woke up at 6am this morning with my clothes still on and the room still bright! Had to still start early today - but thankfully, I have the next 3 days off (yay, can Skype with Sal 2moro!) - and am going back to Melbourne, to meet the first year students for my first official tutoring job at Queen's college.
Today - did my first lumbar puncture. Too scared as a student to do one, but then again most hospitals had policies that students weren't to be doing LPs anyway. The lady was quite large, so identification of the landmarks was quite difficult - but the needle went in fine after one first attempt hitting bone. Unfortunately, even with the needle (which is a pretty impressive needle, abt 15cm long) all the way to the hilt, all that dripped out was blood (known technically as a "bloody tap"), so it wasn't helpful in the end - the lab rang back saying that they couldn't analyse the sample. Poor lady, wouldn't wish that upon anyone - tho her condition was so terrible anyhow, after presenting with an indeterminate cause for altered conscious state, she's now requiring intensive care for airway management. For the rest of my patients, the news was far better - some category two patients I had the pleasure of sending them home with good news and no need for hospital admission. Needless to say, they were also very pleased about the results.
Anywayz, off to sleep soon, am yawning incessantly - at least I have a flight ahead tomorrow instead of a long energy-sapping drive. Till next time, au revoir, and God bless!
Energetic was quite the opposite of how i've been feeling most of today tho - last night completed a 15 hour day, from start to finish, and flopped on my bed, woke up at 6am this morning with my clothes still on and the room still bright! Had to still start early today - but thankfully, I have the next 3 days off (yay, can Skype with Sal 2moro!) - and am going back to Melbourne, to meet the first year students for my first official tutoring job at Queen's college.
Today - did my first lumbar puncture. Too scared as a student to do one, but then again most hospitals had policies that students weren't to be doing LPs anyway. The lady was quite large, so identification of the landmarks was quite difficult - but the needle went in fine after one first attempt hitting bone. Unfortunately, even with the needle (which is a pretty impressive needle, abt 15cm long) all the way to the hilt, all that dripped out was blood (known technically as a "bloody tap"), so it wasn't helpful in the end - the lab rang back saying that they couldn't analyse the sample. Poor lady, wouldn't wish that upon anyone - tho her condition was so terrible anyhow, after presenting with an indeterminate cause for altered conscious state, she's now requiring intensive care for airway management. For the rest of my patients, the news was far better - some category two patients I had the pleasure of sending them home with good news and no need for hospital admission. Needless to say, they were also very pleased about the results.
Anywayz, off to sleep soon, am yawning incessantly - at least I have a flight ahead tomorrow instead of a long energy-sapping drive. Till next time, au revoir, and God bless!
Saturday, February 11, 2006
Melbourne weekend...
Hey all, back in Melbourne now, if only fleetingly. Quite enjoying the relaxation and having home cooked meals again, catching up with family, and catching up with some (much needed) piano practice! Haven’t touched an instrument for so many weeks, so it was quite awkward and tense playing the first few scales and finding my coordination isn’t anything like what it used to be! I needed three goes just to get my hands together playing an E-flat major scale! Shuddering at the thought of how horrible my technique will be when the ten weeks in Mildura ends, and I have access to a piano once again. Thankfully, the hands still remember a few little pieces, including most of the first movement of Beethoven’s violin/piano sonata No. 1, which I’ll hopefully have in a somewhat more practised state when Sal gets back in a few months.
My parents and brother haven’t changed a whole heap. My room at home is still the controlled mess I left it in a few weeks ago – papers and envelopes scattered across the desk waiting for my delayed attention, a credit card statement with a daunting due payment, calendars and books, a bedside table emptied of all the photos, books and objects that I cling tightly to whenever I travel. My parents were eager as ever to share in the spoils of my first couple of paycheques, and we enjoyed a yum cha lunch at Shark Fin, our usual hideout. They’re also hanging out for the dinner at Stefano’s when they come visiting Mildura. As for my brother, he’s finally learnt to come to grips with driving the Magna (our sixteen year-old car – ah, so many memories!), and he continues to throw confusion into his diurnal rhythm, out at night til late visiting friends or partying, then coming home and waking up with the birdcalls in the morning.
Have been asked by so many people about how I’m finding intern life. Apart from being still under a hill (no longer a mountain) of annoying paperwork, I feel things are slowly being sorted out. I’m getting used to the whole working routine, although the mood is still one of groaning and reluctance each morning. Facing the day, waking up alone, knowing Sal is half a world away, is often depressing. But I know that I need to overcome this spectre of gloom and be thankful for the countless blessings I share in. I have a poster and a cross on the wall of my room in Mildura that remind me of my identity in Christ – they’re a great source of encouragement when I feel down, and help me get out of bed in the morning.
Once out of bed though, there’s no time really to stop and think about things – just make sure that I’m fed well enough, making myself presentable, and then fronting up at the Emergency Department, ready for another day. I think the biggest challenge is just remaining calm and trusting in the training we’ve received over the years, when confronted with such variety – anything from the chronic hypochondriac, to cardiac arrests, to traumas, to suicidal patients. The other day, I had to do my first seclusion order, which is when a doctor is required to assess a patient in seclusion room from medical perspective. In summary, check their pulse, breathing, hydration, alertness and orientation, and whatever other medical problems they might have. It sounds scary when one wonders about why on earth the patient was put in seclusion in the first place! Usually, they’re aggressive or unstable, and the doctor comes with a mini army of other personnel to help bring any trouble under control, should it arise. But the patient I was called to assess was quite docile and cooperative when I arrived, sick of being cooped up in a blank room. The poor girl, about my age, was already on such a long list of medications – it’s not surprising that her personality’s so unstable when she’s on so many psychotropic drugs.
The bulk of an intern’s work, though, is clerical. Requesting X-rays, chasing pathology results, documenting cases, reading old histories, researching management options, writing letters to GPs, and organising consultations with specialists, all takes up far more time than actually seeing the patients. It can be frustrating (for patients as well), especially in the cases where more time is spent waiting for results to come back than actually doing things. That said, I’m very fortunate to be working in the emergency department, since it offers such a great opportunity to see an incredible variety of patients (complete with interesting personalities and stories to tell), to do procedures of all sorts (plasters, sutures, needle and surgical drainage of abscesses, IV cannulation, fracture reduction), and to learn from it all.
Back to Mildura tomorrow, armed with a stack of new CD’s for the long drive up, and hopefully refreshed for another week in the sunny orange land. Till next time, God bless!
My parents and brother haven’t changed a whole heap. My room at home is still the controlled mess I left it in a few weeks ago – papers and envelopes scattered across the desk waiting for my delayed attention, a credit card statement with a daunting due payment, calendars and books, a bedside table emptied of all the photos, books and objects that I cling tightly to whenever I travel. My parents were eager as ever to share in the spoils of my first couple of paycheques, and we enjoyed a yum cha lunch at Shark Fin, our usual hideout. They’re also hanging out for the dinner at Stefano’s when they come visiting Mildura. As for my brother, he’s finally learnt to come to grips with driving the Magna (our sixteen year-old car – ah, so many memories!), and he continues to throw confusion into his diurnal rhythm, out at night til late visiting friends or partying, then coming home and waking up with the birdcalls in the morning.
Have been asked by so many people about how I’m finding intern life. Apart from being still under a hill (no longer a mountain) of annoying paperwork, I feel things are slowly being sorted out. I’m getting used to the whole working routine, although the mood is still one of groaning and reluctance each morning. Facing the day, waking up alone, knowing Sal is half a world away, is often depressing. But I know that I need to overcome this spectre of gloom and be thankful for the countless blessings I share in. I have a poster and a cross on the wall of my room in Mildura that remind me of my identity in Christ – they’re a great source of encouragement when I feel down, and help me get out of bed in the morning.
Once out of bed though, there’s no time really to stop and think about things – just make sure that I’m fed well enough, making myself presentable, and then fronting up at the Emergency Department, ready for another day. I think the biggest challenge is just remaining calm and trusting in the training we’ve received over the years, when confronted with such variety – anything from the chronic hypochondriac, to cardiac arrests, to traumas, to suicidal patients. The other day, I had to do my first seclusion order, which is when a doctor is required to assess a patient in seclusion room from medical perspective. In summary, check their pulse, breathing, hydration, alertness and orientation, and whatever other medical problems they might have. It sounds scary when one wonders about why on earth the patient was put in seclusion in the first place! Usually, they’re aggressive or unstable, and the doctor comes with a mini army of other personnel to help bring any trouble under control, should it arise. But the patient I was called to assess was quite docile and cooperative when I arrived, sick of being cooped up in a blank room. The poor girl, about my age, was already on such a long list of medications – it’s not surprising that her personality’s so unstable when she’s on so many psychotropic drugs.
The bulk of an intern’s work, though, is clerical. Requesting X-rays, chasing pathology results, documenting cases, reading old histories, researching management options, writing letters to GPs, and organising consultations with specialists, all takes up far more time than actually seeing the patients. It can be frustrating (for patients as well), especially in the cases where more time is spent waiting for results to come back than actually doing things. That said, I’m very fortunate to be working in the emergency department, since it offers such a great opportunity to see an incredible variety of patients (complete with interesting personalities and stories to tell), to do procedures of all sorts (plasters, sutures, needle and surgical drainage of abscesses, IV cannulation, fracture reduction), and to learn from it all.
Back to Mildura tomorrow, armed with a stack of new CD’s for the long drive up, and hopefully refreshed for another week in the sunny orange land. Till next time, God bless!
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
Long time, no blog...
Long time, no update! Weeks later, I finally get internet at the flat here in Mildura. Not in my room though, have to come across to Sharon's for wireless access - we speculate it's probably the people immediately downstairs from her room who probably have the wireless router. Theoretically, I could sit outside and use it too, just that here where the average top temperature has been around 40 degrees Celsius, one would much rather be inside where there is air-conditioning. Thanks to our anonymous neighbours for having internet that we can piggyback on and use! ;p
This is my third week now of working here. Am working in the Emergency Department in this intriguing hospital - one of a rare breed of privately run public hospitals (who ever thought of such a system before?). The result of this arrangement is that we end up with a nicely furnished facility that looks quite homely, mismatched with an antiquated computer system (it took 10 minutes to recover when there was a power blackout) on which to get results, look up patient details etc. The ED work here is very much like a general practice mixed in with only the odd serious case (what would be far more commonplace in a big city hospital), since there are so few bulk-billing doctors here in Mildura. So we end up dealing with a lot of coughs, colds, cuts, and such like, we need to get adjusted to the mindset of sending a patient away from hospital with almost no intervention quite a lot of the time. As students in big city hospitals, we've become far more accustomed to admitting patients, giving drips, IV medications and fluids, operating, and having patients rapidly go downhill with hospital acquired infections, that sending the patient away having hardly done anything is actually quite a difficult thing to get the head around. That said, there have been several serious cases - some of mine have been admitted with surgical problems (e.g. two appendiceal abscesses, one with obstructive jaundice), and a couple with medical problems (one with atrial flutter, another was a lymphoma patient with anaemia for management). One patient I've had to transfer to Adelaide for further investigation, and one wanted to be transferred to the private hospital. Even the cushy furnishings of Mildura Base weren't luxurious enough - or perhaps the prospect of being examined and interviewed by students wasn't appealing.
Oh, that's another thing we've had to get used to. As interns, we now have some responsibility for the education of our future medical professionals (oh dear)! I have to say though, I quite enjoy having students to teach. They ask me questions, I supervise procedures, and at the same time I keep learning. They're very nice too - the two ED students are both Christians, whom I saw at Church on Sunday, and it's refreshing to see this side of their personality, a good reminder that they (and I) are not limited in our identity with the medical profession. Even the more senior doctors (the registrars, not the consultants) have been very sociable with us, we've been to several dinners, even the local Irish pub. One of the surgical registrars surprised me with a medical history including gout (likely alcohol-related) and his seemingly insatiable smoking habit. One of the consultant surgeons had been similar, but now chews gum in lieu of lighting up. His wife had died of smoking-related cancer of the lung.
So, what is there to do around Mildura? Small country town - yes. But the surroundings are rich with famous wineries, Lindeman's and Trentham Estate among them. Have a bottle of Lindeman's port here, waiting for the perfect dessert to accompany. And what better to accompany some of the country's finest wineries than some of the country's finest restaurants! Several decades ago, a man named Stefano de Pieri settled in Mildura and began cooking. His humble Italian restaurant became the talk of the town, and a restaurant became an empire. If you're enjoying fine food in one of Mildura's many restaurants, then chances are you're eating in one of Stefano's. The Avoca was our venue last Wednesday, an idyllic double decker boat on the Murray river, and the cuisine was quite special - fettucine Gorgonzola with antipasto, Barramundi from the river, and the softest crème caramel I've tasted - a real culinary delight. Then there is Stefano's itself, the pinnacle of dining in Mildura. That's for another time, and we will see whether the restaurant lives up to its boast as the only three-hat restaurant in the state outside of Melbourne.
When we're not working or eating, it's swimming. The heat here can be quite amazing. It was like going to Montréal, thinking we could handle the weather, and ending up spending several days inside because it was simply too cold. Likewise, here, we thought we could handle the Mildura heat - apart from the fact that it keeps topping the weather forecasts, we'd put up with 40+ degree days before in Melbourne. It couldn't be too bad. But coming here is another thing entirely, and 40+ for day after day with no relief is quite unbearable! Most of the days, thankfully, have been spent indoors one way or another. Many of them were spent working. But swimming can be done for $5 in the indoor pool (which would be considered quite a hot pool by most people's standards, but is really cool relief compared to the outdoor heat), or for free in the Murray River. The river is actually quite nice to swim in, apart from the fact that visibility is so short underwater. It's not the cleanest river around, but much better than the Yarra for sure! Still, there's often an influx of earache patients after a hot day - history of swimming in the river, ear pain. Luckily I have managed to escape the otitis externa so far.
Have seven and a half weeks left here. Mostly things have been enjoyable so far, but not always. Sometimes I'm bored. Sometimes it's lonely. Sometimes I feel like breaking and sleeping and not waking up for weeks. Or going on a long drive back to Melbourne for not much reason at all. And I miss Sal heaps. Sometimes all I want is her smile, her presence, to hug her. But I know that God will carry me through. We've survived so far, and at least we can look forward to seeing one another again.
Enough for one blog. Hope to write again soon. Til next time, God bless!
This is my third week now of working here. Am working in the Emergency Department in this intriguing hospital - one of a rare breed of privately run public hospitals (who ever thought of such a system before?). The result of this arrangement is that we end up with a nicely furnished facility that looks quite homely, mismatched with an antiquated computer system (it took 10 minutes to recover when there was a power blackout) on which to get results, look up patient details etc. The ED work here is very much like a general practice mixed in with only the odd serious case (what would be far more commonplace in a big city hospital), since there are so few bulk-billing doctors here in Mildura. So we end up dealing with a lot of coughs, colds, cuts, and such like, we need to get adjusted to the mindset of sending a patient away from hospital with almost no intervention quite a lot of the time. As students in big city hospitals, we've become far more accustomed to admitting patients, giving drips, IV medications and fluids, operating, and having patients rapidly go downhill with hospital acquired infections, that sending the patient away having hardly done anything is actually quite a difficult thing to get the head around. That said, there have been several serious cases - some of mine have been admitted with surgical problems (e.g. two appendiceal abscesses, one with obstructive jaundice), and a couple with medical problems (one with atrial flutter, another was a lymphoma patient with anaemia for management). One patient I've had to transfer to Adelaide for further investigation, and one wanted to be transferred to the private hospital. Even the cushy furnishings of Mildura Base weren't luxurious enough - or perhaps the prospect of being examined and interviewed by students wasn't appealing.
Oh, that's another thing we've had to get used to. As interns, we now have some responsibility for the education of our future medical professionals (oh dear)! I have to say though, I quite enjoy having students to teach. They ask me questions, I supervise procedures, and at the same time I keep learning. They're very nice too - the two ED students are both Christians, whom I saw at Church on Sunday, and it's refreshing to see this side of their personality, a good reminder that they (and I) are not limited in our identity with the medical profession. Even the more senior doctors (the registrars, not the consultants) have been very sociable with us, we've been to several dinners, even the local Irish pub. One of the surgical registrars surprised me with a medical history including gout (likely alcohol-related) and his seemingly insatiable smoking habit. One of the consultant surgeons had been similar, but now chews gum in lieu of lighting up. His wife had died of smoking-related cancer of the lung.
So, what is there to do around Mildura? Small country town - yes. But the surroundings are rich with famous wineries, Lindeman's and Trentham Estate among them. Have a bottle of Lindeman's port here, waiting for the perfect dessert to accompany. And what better to accompany some of the country's finest wineries than some of the country's finest restaurants! Several decades ago, a man named Stefano de Pieri settled in Mildura and began cooking. His humble Italian restaurant became the talk of the town, and a restaurant became an empire. If you're enjoying fine food in one of Mildura's many restaurants, then chances are you're eating in one of Stefano's. The Avoca was our venue last Wednesday, an idyllic double decker boat on the Murray river, and the cuisine was quite special - fettucine Gorgonzola with antipasto, Barramundi from the river, and the softest crème caramel I've tasted - a real culinary delight. Then there is Stefano's itself, the pinnacle of dining in Mildura. That's for another time, and we will see whether the restaurant lives up to its boast as the only three-hat restaurant in the state outside of Melbourne.
When we're not working or eating, it's swimming. The heat here can be quite amazing. It was like going to Montréal, thinking we could handle the weather, and ending up spending several days inside because it was simply too cold. Likewise, here, we thought we could handle the Mildura heat - apart from the fact that it keeps topping the weather forecasts, we'd put up with 40+ degree days before in Melbourne. It couldn't be too bad. But coming here is another thing entirely, and 40+ for day after day with no relief is quite unbearable! Most of the days, thankfully, have been spent indoors one way or another. Many of them were spent working. But swimming can be done for $5 in the indoor pool (which would be considered quite a hot pool by most people's standards, but is really cool relief compared to the outdoor heat), or for free in the Murray River. The river is actually quite nice to swim in, apart from the fact that visibility is so short underwater. It's not the cleanest river around, but much better than the Yarra for sure! Still, there's often an influx of earache patients after a hot day - history of swimming in the river, ear pain. Luckily I have managed to escape the otitis externa so far.
Have seven and a half weeks left here. Mostly things have been enjoyable so far, but not always. Sometimes I'm bored. Sometimes it's lonely. Sometimes I feel like breaking and sleeping and not waking up for weeks. Or going on a long drive back to Melbourne for not much reason at all. And I miss Sal heaps. Sometimes all I want is her smile, her presence, to hug her. But I know that God will carry me through. We've survived so far, and at least we can look forward to seeing one another again.
Enough for one blog. Hope to write again soon. Til next time, God bless!
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